Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness. You're generally good at balancing work and play. When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done. But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have medium agreeableness. You're generally a friendly and trusting person. But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism. You get along well with others, as long as they play fair. Neuroticism: You have low neuroticism. You are very emotionally stable and mentally together. Only the greatest setbacks upset you, and you bounce back quickly. Overall, you are typically calm and relaxed - making others feel secure. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is medium. You are generally broad minded when it come to new things. But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it. You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

The Five Factor Personality Test

How well do you get along with others?
Here is the analysis:
You truly believe in friendship. You get along well with others, and those who are around you are happy to be with you, too. You love to be surrounded by friends and you'll do anything you can to help them without expecting anything in return. When your friends are smiling, you're as happy as you can be.

Get to know yourself better
Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

What type of personality do you have?
Here is the analysis:

Bright and Cheerful
You are always cheerful and charming. You never get too serious with people when they're around, but when you are alone, you think carefully about what they have said. That's because you don't want anyone to see you being too somber. Your personality means you have a lot of friends and you are often the center of attention. Many people who fall into this category become artists and movie stars, perhaps fame could be yours in the future as well.

Your Hidden Talent
Here is the analysis:

The Mass Communicator
You have a cheerful personality and you are a naturally kind person. Your hidden talent isn't really that hidden at all: you shine among a crowd. You would make an ideal news announcer, flight attendant or model - any position that would give you an opportunity to deal with plenty of people. A tip for you is to avoid getting too deeply involved in others' personal lives - otherwise you might find yourself constantly being asked for help.

What do your friends think of you?
Here is the analysis:
You are popular. Your friends feel at ease when they are around you. You are cheerful and lovely. It's not surprising that you have many good friends. You always feel happy for others, not a glimpse of envy. This is your unique character. Keep up!

Your Working Style
You are friendly, adaptable realists. You rely on what you see, hear, and know first-hand. You good-naturedly accept and use the facts around you. You look for a satisfying solution instead of trying to impose any "should" or "must" of your own. You are sure a satisfying solution will turn up once you have grasped all the facts.
You solve problems by being adaptable, and often can get other to adapt, too. People generally like you well enough to consider any compromise you suggest. You are unprejudiced open-minded, and tolerant of most everyone--including yourself. You take things as they are and thus may be very good at easing a tense situation and pulling conflicting factions together.
With your focus on the current situation and realistic acceptance of what exists, you can be a gifted problem solver. Because you are not necessarily bound by a need to follow standard procedures or preferred methods, you are often able to see ways of achieving a goal by "using" the existing rules, systems, or circumstances in new ways, rather than allowing them to be roadblocks.
You are actively curious about people, activities, food, objects, scenery, or anything new presented to your senses. Your expert abilities in using your senses may show in:
a continuous ability to see the need of the moment and turn easily to meet it
the ability to absorb, apply and remember great numbers of facts
an artistic taste and judgement
the handling of tools and materials You make your decisions by using the personal values of feeling rather than the logical analysis of thinking. Your feeling makes you tactful, sympathetic, interested in people, and especially good at handling human contacts. You may be too easy in matters of discipline. You learn far more from first-hand experience than from books, and do better in actual situations than on written tests. Abstract ideas and theories are not likely to be trusted by you until you have been tested in experience. You may have to work harder than other people to achieve in school, but can do so when you see the relevance.
You do best in careers needing realism, action, and adaptability. Examples are health services, sales, design, transportation, entertainment, secretarial or office work, food service, supervising work groups, machine operation, and many kinds of troubleshooting.
You are strong in the art of living. You get a lot of fun out of life, which makes you good company. You enjoy your material possessions and take the time to acquire you. You find much enjoyment in good food, clothes, music, and art. You enjoy physical exercise and sports, and usually are good at these.
How effective you are depends on how much judgment you acquire. You may need to develop your feeling so that they can use your values to provide standards for your behavior, and direction and purpose in your lives. If your judgment is not developed enough to give you any character or stick-to-it-iveness, you are in danger of adapting mainly to your own love of a good time.

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved. You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy. You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please. Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred. In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

How You Life Your Life

You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside. You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think. You tend to have one best friend you hang with, as opposed to many aquaintences. You tend to dream big, but you worry that your dreams aren't attainable.

How Do You Live Your Life?

You Are 30% Boyish and 70% Girlish

Even if you're not a girl, you're very feminine. You're in touch with your feelings, and your heart rules you. A bit of a emotional roller coaster, one moment you're up and the next you're down. But no matter what, you try to be as cute and perky as possible.

How Boyish or Girlish Are You?

Your Birthdate: September 2

You're so intuitive, it's like you have a sixth, seventh, and eighth sense. You connect with others freely and easily - and you tend to have many best friends. Warm and caring, it's hard for you to close your heart to anyone. Affection is like air for you - you need to give and receive it to survive. Your strength: Your universal compassion Your weakness: Your unpredictable mood swings Your power color: Mauve Your power symbol: Butterfly Your power month: February

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Your Seduction Style: Au Natural

You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it. That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power! The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism. You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world. Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in. You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you? You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways. Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you. As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you.

What Kind of Seducer Are You?

Jesus is the only way, the only truth, and the only life.

1. what is your full name? Tracy Leung
>.2. Are you happy with it? yes
>.3. Are you named after anyone? nope
>.5. Your screenname: trai V( 'o'){BFF!}('o' )/*/
?? >.6. Would you name a child of yours after you? dun think so
>.7. Then what would you name your children? camille or logan :D
>.8. If you were a boy, what would your name be? Logan or Hayden!
>.9. If you could switch names with a friend, who would that be? hmmm i like the name julianna. yeah i do -__-
>.10. Are there any typos that people do with your name ? TRACI, i hatee being called that
>.11. Would you drop your last name if you became famous? hmm. lol. cud u do that? probably not
>.12. Your gender: girl
>.13. Straight/gay/bi? straight
>.15. Want to be gay? no
>.*15. Want to be lez?no
>.16. Your birthdate? Sept 2
>.17. Your age: 15
.18. Age you act: Yeah i guess
>.19. Age you wish you were: driving age >=)
>.20. Your height:? 5'1-3ish
>.21. The color of your eyes: dark brown/black
>.22. Happy with it? BLUe/greeenn >=)
>.23. The color of your hair: black with old brown dyed hair.. will be dyed soon >=)
>.24. Happy with it? no, but i like the straightness :)
>.25. Left/right/ambidextrous? right
>.26. Your living arrangement? family without 1 sis at the moment
>.27. Your family: mom dad 2 sis
>.28. Have any pets? one poor lonely fish called FAYFAY :)
>.29. What's your job? dun haf one.. want one :P
>.30. Piercings? 2
>.31. Tattoos? no
>.32. Obsessions? JET LI >:) kind of.. not as much nemore
>.33. Addictions? tranceee :).. music
>.35. Do you speak another language? cantonese
>.36. Have a favorite quote? ummm... "hahahha"?
>.37. Do you have a webpage? yes
>-------------------------------------------------
>DEEP THOUGHTS about life and you in it
>-------------------------------------------------
>.38. Do you live in the moment? lol.. um not always
>.39. Do you consider yourself tolerant of others? usually yes, but seriously depends. depends how well i know the person and how much i like them
>.40. Do you have any secrets? ofcourse
>.41. Do you hate yourself? lol no?
>.42. Do you like your handwriting? its fine
>.43. Do you have any bad habits? yes
>.44. What is the compliment you get most from people? "you're mature"
>.45. If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called? Trai's.. life...?
>.46. What's your biggest fear? scary stuff.. supernatural stuff -__-
>.47. Can you sing? everybody can
>.48. Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool? as a joke, yes
>.49. Are you a loner? i haf friends :)
>.50. What are your no. 1 priorities in life? fam&friends
>.51. If you were another person, would you be friends with you? yess
>.52. Are you a daredevil? not reelli
>.53.Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself? hmm..not really
>.54. Are you passive or aggressive? depending on situation/mood
>.56.What is your greatest strength and weakness? i dont' really know
>.57. If you could change one thing about yourself,wat would it be? wow. where do i begin? haha
>.58. 3 cups: love, beauty and creativity.? love
>.59. How do you vent? not usually at people
>.60. Do you think you are emotionally strong? try to be?
>.61.Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life? tons
>.62. Do you think life has been good so far? definitely better then alot of others
>.63. What is the most important lesson u've learned from life? love, tolerance, so many moree...
>.64. What do you like the most about your body? nothing -__-
>.65. And least? wow. alot. haha
>.66. Do you think you are good looking? not really
>.67. Are you confident? haha not really, but not insecure
>.68. What is the fictional character you're most like? wow, hmmm needa think of that
>.69. Do people know how you feel? not always. depends
>.70. Are you perceived wrongly? yes
>-------------------------------------------
>DO YOU...
>-----------------------------------------
>.71. Smoke? no
>.72. Do drugs? no
>.73. Read the newspaper? barely
>.74. Pray? yes
>.75. Go to church? yes
>.76. Talk to strangers: lol, not on the street
>.77. Sleep with stuffed animals? yes
>.78. Take walks in the rain? yes
>.79. Talk to people even though you hate them? depends
>.80. Drive? i want to
>.81. Like to drive fast? in video games >:)
>-----------------------------------
>WOULD OR HAVE YOU EVER...
>-----------------------------------
>.82. Liked your voice? its okay?
>.83. Hurt yourself? yeh
>.84. Been out of the country? yeh
>.85. Eaten something that made other people sick? ummm not sure
>.86. Had sex? no
>.87. Been unfaithful? to god, yes
>.88. Fallen in love? not sure
>.89. Done drugs? no
>.90. Gone skinny dipping? no
>.91. Had a medical emergency? yeh
>.92. Had surgery? no
>.93. Ran away from home? no
>.94. Played strip poker? no
>.95. Gotten beaten up? no
>.96. Beaten someone up? haha nah
>.97. Been picked on? yeh i think so
>.98. Been on stage? yeh
>.100. Slept outdoors? yeh
>.101. Thought about suicide? i think so.. longggg time ago.
>.102. Pulled an all-nighter? yeh
>.103. If yes, what is your record? lol not that long
>.104. Gone one day without food? yes. 30 hr famine!
>.105. Talked on the phone all night? haha yehh
>.106. Slept together with the opposite sex without actually having sex? think so. not bout the sex part -__-
>.107. Slept all day? dunt hink so.. well wen i was a baby?
>.108. Killed someone? no
>.109. Made out with a stranger? no
>.110. Had sex with a stranger? no
>.111. Thought you were going crazy? yess
>.112. Kissed the same sex? cheeks
>.113. Done anything sexual with the same sex? no
>.114. Been betrayed? yeh
>.115. Had a dream that came true? yeh
>.116. Broken the law? dL music
>.117. Met a famous person? yes
>.145. Told a secret you swore you wouldn't tell? yeh
>.146. Stolen anything? candy i think?.. not sure
>.147. Been on radio/tv? not sure
>.148. Been in a mosh-pit? i think so
>.149. Had a nervous breakdown? yes
>.150. Considered religious vocation? wuts that
>.151. Been critisized about your sexual performance? er no
>.152. Bungee jumped? i want to!
>.153. Had a dream that kept coming back? i think so
>---------------------------------------------
>CLOTHES and other fashionshit
>-------------------------------------------
>.154. Shoe brand? phatfarm/nike/othergoodstuff:)
>.155. Brand of clothing? POOOMAAA :) and alota other stuff
>.156. Cologne/perfume? gap white & some fruity thing carol gave me, mmm smells good
>.157. What are you normally wearing to school? pants and tshirt + sweater
>.158. How about parties? same
>.159. Wear hats? sometimes
>.160. Judge other people by their clothing? subconsciously
>.161. Wear make-up? yeh
>.162. Favourite place to shop? grove city :)
>.163. Favourite article of clothing? tshirts and hoodies
>.164. Are you trendy? normal?
>.165. Would you rather wear a uniform to school? no
>------------------------------------------
>BELIEFS
>------------------------------------------
>.166. Believe in life on other planets? not su re
>.167. Miracles? yes
>.168. Astrology? no
>.169. Magic? haha no
>.170. God? yes
>.171. Satan? yes
>.172. Santa? no
>.173. Ghosts? >____<>.174. Luck? no
>.175. Love at first sight? i'll come back to that, its a longgg confooozin question
>.176. Yin and Yang? no.. dun even kno wut that is
>.177. Witches? no
>.178. Easter bunny? no
>.179. Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever? yes
>.180. Believe there's a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? haha not technically
>.181. Do you wish on stars? haha yes
>-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>DEEP THEOLOGICAL QUESTIONS
>------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>.182. Do you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell? as clarissa said: i believe in Heaven and Hell..there is no traditional or non-traditional view..
>.183. Do you think God has a gender? male? hence "Father"
>.184. Do you think that science counteracts religion? in a way, yes
>.185. Do you believe in organized religion? um, not sure wut that is
>.186. Where do you think we go when we die? depends on what you believe in
>-----------------------------------------
>AMIGOS
>---------------------------------------
>.187. Do you have any gay/lesbian friends? yeh
>.188. Who is your best friend? amanda
>.189. Who's the one person that knows most about you? i think amanda
>.190. Best advice? dont' procrastinate :P
>.191. Your favourite inside joke? haha too many
>.192. Thing you're picked on most about? being short
>.193. Who's your longest known friend? jess lam, carol, rachel, adrian, claire&cat
>.194. Newest? wooowww, how do i answer that man
>.195. Shyest? mmm... cant think of one
>.196. Funniest? haha you're all funnie :)
>.197. Sweetest? jellz :)
>.198. Closest? BFF
>.199. Weirdest? haha all of 'em
>.200. Smartest? um... serena?
>.201. Ditziest? haha ingrid!
>.202. Friends you miss being close to the most? alot
>.203. Last person you talked to online? chris
>.204. Who do you talk to most online? chris, jono, amanda, ing
>.205. Who are you on the phone with most? kevin & amanda
>.206. Who do you trust most? amanda & goh
>.207. Who listens to your problems? amanda & goh
>.208. Who do you fight most with? lil sis
>.209. Who's the nicest? hmmmm becky :)
>.210. Who's the most outgoing? mmmm u guys are mostly not shy
>.211. Who's the best singer? all u can sing :)
>.212. Who's on your shit-list? hahaha i dont' know
>.213. Have you ever thought of having sex with a friend? er, no
>.214. Who's your second family? closests & bebeELLES
>.215. Do you always feel understood? no
>.216. Who's the loudest friend? hahaha we allllll loud
>.217. Do you trust others easily? no
>.218. hmm where is it? underWEAR? hehee
>.219. Name one person who's arms you feel safe in? um
>.220. Do your friends know you? generally the happier side

>.221. Friend that lives farthest away? cant rememb
>--------------------------------------------
>LOVE, and all that
>-------------------------------------------
>.222. Did you get frightened or uncomfortable seing that as a section title?? haha no
>.223. Do you remember your first love? not sure who was my first love
>.224. Still love him/her? not sure who was my first love
>.225. Do you consider love a mistake? not sure... ARG. read the top -__-
>.226. What do you find romantic? millions of things :)
>.227. Turn-on? non-dramaticized sweetness, humor
>.228. Turn-off? oversensitivity
>.229. First kiss ever? eh
>.230. If someone liked u, but u had no feelings for them, what would you do? nothing? depends wuts going on
>.231. Do you like knowing someone b4 you date? duh
>.232. Do u wish girls could ask guys out more? no
>.233. Have you ever been attracted to an unatractive guy? hahaha yes
>.234. Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking? iuno
>.235. What is best about the opposite sex? lol iuno
>.236. What is the worst thing about the opposite sex? definitely immaturity
>.236. Do you read porn? no
>.237. Read the articles? no
>.238. Just the pics? no
>.239. What's the last present someone gave you? i forgot >_O bday present?
>.240. Are you in love? uhhh no?
>.241. Do you consider your significant other hot? i dun haf one
>.242. When you see a hot guy wut do u do? tell ingrid, haha
>---------------------------------------
>THE BATTLE OF THE SEXES
>--------------------------------------
>.243. Have you ever wished you could experience being the other gender? haha no
>.244. What would you do if u were a boy? be mature :P jk
>.245. What do you love most about the other gender? iunoo
>.246. What do you dislike most? wasn't this already asked
>.247. What do you understand least? how they think
>.248. What do you notice first in the opposite sex? eyes
>------------------------------------------------
>POSESSIONS
>----------------------------------------------
>.249. What is your fave posession? cant think of it a the moment, but alot
?
>.250. What physical, tangible posession do you want most? hmmmmm. brendans mp3! lol
>.252. Have you ever seen The Exorcist? no, itll f reak the heck out of me -__-
>---------------------------------------------
>WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON...
>---------------------------------------------
>.254. That haunted you? wut'd u mean haunt
>.255. You wanted to kill? haha sis -__-
>.256. That you laughed at? kevin
>.257. That laughed at you? kevin
>.258. That turned you on? no one
>.259. You went shopping with? mom&sis
>.260. That broke your heart? _________
>.261. To disappoint you? no names
>.262. To ask you out? __________
>.263. To make you cry? _________
>.264. To brighten up your day? lol matt
>.265. That you thought about? wow, alot?
>.267. You saw a movie with? viv,ang,keith,jeff,gabriel
>.268. You talked to on the phone? kevin
>.269. You talked to through IM/ICQ? chris
>.270. You saw? famfam
>.271. You lost? ________
>.272. You went head over heels for? _________
>.273. You thought was completely N-U-T-Z? hahaha matt
>.274. You wanted to be? hahhaha i dunno
>.275. You told to f*ck off? Looool _________
>.276. You trusted? :)
>.277. You turned down? _________
>------------------------------------------------
>WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU
>-----------------------------------------------
>.278. Smiled? now. haha
>.279. Laughed? now. hahaha
>.280. Cried? does it count when thers something in ur eye
>.281. Bought something? saturday
>.282. Danced? dun remember
>.283. Were sarcastic? neverrr 8-)
>.285. Talked to an ex? today?
>.286. Watched your fave movie? i have tonsss :)
>.287. Had a nightmare? dun remember
>.288. Talked on the phone?? today
>.289. Listened to the radio? today
>.290. Watched TV? today
>.291. Went out? with friends? week ago
>.292. Helped someone? today
>.293. Were mean? haha today
>.294. Sang? today
>.295. Saw a movie? hmm cant remember
>.296. Said I love you? today
>.297. Missed someone? today
>.298. Fought with a family member? today
>.299. Fought with a friend? dun remember
>.300. Had a serious conversation? hmm..
>.301. Smoked weed? never
>.302. Got drunk? never
>.303. Had sex? never
>--------------------------------------
>A LAST TIME for everything...
>--------------------------------------
>.304. Last book you read: today :)
>.305. Last movie you saw: lemme think. i think mulan
>.306. Last song you heard: why oh why - ATC
>.307. Last thing you had to drink:apple juice
>.308. Last time you showered:? today
>.309. Last thing you ate: dinner
>.310. Last CD you bought: switchfoot - beautiful letdown
>----------------------------------------------------
>RIGHT THIS MOMENT...
>----------------------------------------------------
>.315. What are you wearing right now? jeans & tshirt
>.316. Body-part you're touching right now: umm none?
>.317. What are you worried about right now? nothing really
>318. What book are you reading? "The Resort"
>.319. What's on your mouse pad? "CorelDraw10"
>.320. 5 words 2 describe how you're feeling: tired, content
>.321. Are you bored? okay la
>.322. Are you tired? kinda
>.323. Are you talking to anyone online? yeh
>.324. Are you talking to anyone on the phone? no
>.325. Are you lonely or content? content
>.326. Are you listening to music? yeh
>--------------------------------------------------
>NUMBERS
>-------------------------------------------------
>.327. Do you laugh when you hear the number 69? depends if i'm feelin giddy
>.328. Are you lying about that question? no
>.329. Do you actually know your social security number? no
>.330. Do you actually know your IP address? no
>.331. Do you know what an IP address is? yes
>.332. Do you know the four-character extension on your zip-code? huh?
>.333. You ever think there are too many numbers in our lives? lol not relli
>.334. Does your head hurt when you think of infinity, irrational>numbers, etc? yes
>.335. What do you think of pi? its stupid. hahaha some guy spent all his life writing dowon like 1000 of the numbers and at like 300 something or something he got it wrong so the rest 700 were all messed up. poorrr guy XP
>.336. Have you got a fave number? not really. 3?
>.337. How many rings before you take the phone? depends where i am located in the house. usually 2-3
>.338. Do you type with your fingers on the right keys? yeah
>.339. How many CD's do you have? alot of burned ones
>--------------------------------------------
>COMPUTERS
>-------------------------------------------
>.340. Mac or PC? PC
>.341. What form of IM do you use? msn
>.342. Do you ever begin preferring IMs to other forms of conversations? face 2 face always best
>.343. Are you different talking through IMs than face-to-face or telephone? realy not sure
>.344. Have you ever ended bid on something on eBay and regretted it later? nop
>.345. How much time do you spend online each week? too much -__-
>.346. Is the internet one of the modern things you could never live without? lol yehh
>.347. Do you even receive snailmail letters anymore? wuts that
>.348. Send any? wuts thaattt
>.349. What's your fav smiley? :) ^____^ XD XP ... and the list goes on
>.350. If you could meet anyone in the world who would it be? jet li =D
>.351. Who is your idol? God..?
>.352. What band has the funniest name? hahaha get bak to u on that one

wowww i was bored :D
took me practically an hour. hahaha

had lunch with chris on friday. hi lite of the week. thanks so much. we didn't talk about much deep stuff, but the laughs were wut made it all worth it :) thanks so much.

Do you hav a mother like this one?

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE - "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside - I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me RELIGION - "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL - "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC - "Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me FORESIGHT - "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me IRONY - "Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS - "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM - "Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA - "You'll sit there 'til all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER - "It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS - "If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you; would you listen then?"

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY - "If I've told you once, I've told you a million times - Don't exaggerate!!!"

My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE - "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION - "Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY - "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

THANKS, MOM!